Have I become wiser?

How does someone know if they have become wiser? How do you know you are a wise person or not? What is wise? What is the characteristic of a wise man? Once upon a time, people pictured wise man as someone who was old, doing meditation, contemplating on life and lived in secluded area such as deep in the forest, on mountaintop and if they can maybe in deep of the sea ;p. Nowadays, I’m not sure how people pictures wise man.

Basically, in psychology we do make measurement of many variables of humans, including their traits. And I’m sure there’s been wise measurement and there’s also conclusion or theory or characteristic of a wise person. Personally, I have not read single one about that. Hehehehehehe… Anyway, the topic of wise suddenly pop in my mind after I read my friend’s twit about her birthday ‘wisdom’, she basically said getting older means getting wiser, getting better and getting happier (courtesy of Rahmatika, 2011 ;p). And it makes me questioning about myself.

Am I a wise person? I never think that way; surely wise was not one of my characteristics. I even dare you to find one person who thinks that I am! And now I’m reflecting on my life. Did I’ve become wiser than a year ago, a month ago, and a day ago? In some ways, I think I am.

How do I know that? You see, I’m a ‘process’ person, that is in the simple term; person who believe in process and not really care about the results. I enjoy being in the process, yeah until you've realized that the processes are you in troubles, you are in hard situations, and you are in despair. Then the only thought that crosses my mind was I want to get out from this, I want it to end soon. So much of a process person ^^;

The processes that I’ve been through and still going through are not an easy one, when I think that I have a grasp on it, suddenly it fell apart again. When I think that I’m enjoyed being in the process, suddenly I felt despair, scared and lost again. But the great thing is when you walked with God, it get easier by each step you take (Isaiah 41:13). I’ve been through that, for the first time when I decided to walk this path with God, the problems seemed so hard, I easily got lost, easily got scared, so hard for me to rely completely in God and trusted Him. But for the second time around -and hopefully for every rounds- I can feel His presence with me, I can rely everything with Him and it is more easy to feel His joy this time J. I still fell down but it gets easier to stand up and walk again with Him (Psalm 73:23). How I am blessed!

For me, God is God of process. I liked to think that He lays everything in the process, His faithfulness, His grace, His mercy, His teachings, His love, His reprimand (2Corinthians 12:9-10). And when we rush in the process to get to the end, to get the results, we surely miss a lot of His goodness. Don’t get too preoccupied with the results, with what we will get, because it already being prepared and provided by Him (1Corinthians 2:9). He already promised that, it will go nowhere. So at the mean time, let’s dwelling in His goodness through the processes!

Of course, it always easy to do the talk, but it never gets easier to walk the talk. I know that, because in moment of troubles sometimes it is hard to see that. That’s why I believe the power of support groups (1Corinthians 12:25). When I looked back, I can smile and feel His presence and His ways of showing me what I’ve been forgetting through my support groups. My best friend reminds me on how I believe on process, that the Oliph she knew was Oliph that can endure every process, Oliph who was getting strong in every process. My brothers -who I very truly blessed to have-, reminded me everything that I have been telling them in their moments of troubles. They reminds me of the God their sister has faith in, the God their sister has been blessed with, the God their sister processing with. And in that time I knew that my God was never once leaving me behind (Deuteronomy 31:8). 

This is how I know I have become wiser (I’m not comfortable saying I am a wise person) than I was before. And I have my Father to be thankful for! J

Try again
Never stop believing
Try again
Don't give up on your love
Stumble and fall
Is the heart of it all
When you fall down
Just try again
-Try Again, Westlife-
(Our support group theme song ;p)